The Secret Ingredient

Do you know one of those people who “just has it”? You know the type, they can be a guy or a girl who is very average looking, not rich or famous, yet always seems to have the attention of the opposite sex. Do you know what they have that others don’t? Confidence. As we all know, confidence is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

So how do you increase your own confidence? It’s very simple actually. First off, you need to love yourself. If you don’t love yourself, how do you expect others to love you? Change your attitude today, as in right now. Instead of bombarding your head with negative thoughts, start thinking positively. Every time a negative thought pops in your head, banish it immediately. Start thinking about all the positive qualities you have.

A fast way to improve confidence.

As an excersize, take a pen and paper and write down all the positive things about yourself. Come up with as much as you can. Are you nice? Are you attractive, smart, or funny? Anything you can think of that anyone has ever complimented you on, write it down. Even if you don’t agree with them. Come up with list of great things, and keep it in your purse, or on the nightstand. Add to it whenever something comes to mind. Every day, read it to yourself at least once. Read this list until you are absolutely sick of reading it.

Soon, you’ll have that list memorized, and you won’t even need to look at it to know what it says. And you know what else? Your subconcious will have it memorized as well. Studies have proven the power of the subconcious mind, and it’s vast potential for self improvement. By telling yourself these positive things every day, you’ll notice a difference rather quick.

Be proud of yourself.

The next step is giving yourself something to be proud of. What are you good at? What do you like to do? No matter what it is, anything from snowboarding to knitting, think about ways you can make yourself better at it. Set goals, preferably small goals, and focus on achieving them. If you play the guitar, set out to learn a song and learn it. Improve upon these skills constantly until you’ve mastered it.

You might be asking, what in the heck does this have to do with dating? It’s completely relevant. When you are good at something, anything, you become more confident. When you improve yourself, and you are good at something, you carry that with you throughout the day. You begin to slowly love yourself more, and become more confident, and it shows. Not to mention it’s a good conversation starter. Which brings me to the next step, conversation!

Conversation Fuel.

In order to have conversations with others, you have to have something to talk about. Take some time to think about something you’re really interested, and learn something about it. Go down to the library or hit the internet and pick up a few things about it when you’re bored. Become an “expert” on something and talk about it. Everyone is impressed by knowledge. You don’t have to be an acedemic to be able to hold a conversation about a subject.

Also, subscribe to the newspaper,and read about current events. Newspapers are varied enough that there has to be something of interest in there for you. This gives you something to talk about at parties and social events. Again it doesn’t take much to hold a conversation.

When engaged in conversation, become interested in the other person. Really listen to what they have to say. Everyone loves talking about themselves. Use their name frequently also, nothing sounds sweeter to someone than their own name. Becoming a better conversationalist will build your confidence.

Appearance.

Ok, you knew this one was coming. Looks aren’t everything, but they’re a great asset to have. We can’t all be movie star hot, but there are things anyone can do to make themselves hotter. The first thing:

Smile. You never can smile too much. Smiling is contagious, and if you’re always smiling, and the other person is smiling, it creates an instant bond, and a clear indicator that the date is going well. Smiling tends to affect your mood also, so smiling more just might make you happier.

Take care of yourself. This one is very important. Make sure your clothes are clean, you are showered and shaved, with brushed hair and teeth at all times. Sure, you might feel lazy in the morning and skip the shower, then run to the store really quick. But while you’re out you will feel like everyone knows you didn’t take a shower, and everyone knows you stink. You wouldn’t go out on a date this way right?

Anytime you are showered, clean with brushed teeth and good breath your confidence is higher. And thats what we’re shooting for.

Excersize. Did you know that just by simply taking a walk every day, you can lose as much weight as someone who runs a few times a week? It’s true, by elevating your heart rate and working your muscles you are burning calories. And doing it every day improves your metabolism. Losing a few pounds always adds to your confidence level.

Try new styles. Try doing your hair different, or dressing a little different, and see the response. A new look is a great way to build up your confidence, especially if it really works for you. Don’t be afraid to try new things.

Conclusion

In the end, what really matters overall is what you think of yourself. Learn to love yourself. This doesn’t mean you should turn into an egomaniac, it just means you like who you are, and are ok with yourself. This goes a very long way towards building your own confidence. And when you’re confident, you’re sexy. This will help you attract more people than you ever imagined.

By: Jeremy Morgan

Jeremy Morgan is a freelance writer who often writes about dating advice and other subjects.

It appears like you don’t have an idea of how to make a relationship work if you are reading this. Some men and women are skeptical characters; they like making relationships but are least interested in keeping it going under some pretext or the other. Let’s accept it; the hardest part of making a relationship work is to forgive each others mistakes. Looking back at how you learnt what is most irresistible about men/women may perhaps move you closer towards how to make a relationship work and how to turn pain to pride.

I have grown up watching couples that have lived in harmonious relationships and learnt how to build not just a marriage but how to make a relationship work. Through my own experiences and that I picked up from others, I can say, it is important thing to understand how to make a relationship work through troubles, challenges, struggles, joys. It may sound exciting to learn how to make a relationship work but the fact of the matter remains the inspiration for that has to come from within and not from anywhere else which may be hard to cultivate. You may begin by the simple concept of giving, but it actually reaches the heart of how to make a relationship work.

Relationships must weather all pressure all through the relationship. Like circumstances, every couple, person and relationship is different. A relationship has space only to be caring, loving, and healthy and there exists no place for negative aspects and approaches. Differences begin to crop up when you compare your relationship to friends, coworkers family members that you believe whose relationship appears to be just right. If you want to know the secret to how to make a relationship work do everything you can do to improve it. Take it from me; if you can manage for a couple of years or more, then there are all the chances that you know how to make a relationship work.

Relationships require silent commitments from both of you, but this is not a simple concept that you can go out and vow on it. Both of you need to be very patient towards each other, shouldn’t pick or presume mistakes. It may appear to be hurting your pride initially but this is why I said it takes silent commitments. The last lesson in how to make a relationship work is not to search for causes for differences in each other’s characters.

By: Michael S. Francis

Michael S. Francis is a SEO consultant of Free Phone Chat Line . If you are looking for a 100% free phone chat line in the United States that never charges a fee, click here Phone Number For Free Chat Line.

If you want this relationship to get past the third or fourth date, a great sexual rapport is vital.

Most of us are anxious about our bedroom abilities. It doesn’t matter how beatific our partner’s smile, there’s a voice in the back of our head wondering if we were good enough. So here’s the good news: you don’t have to be amazing in bed to build up a rapport – but the more of a rapport you build, the better you’re going to become.

When you meet a new girl, remember that she’s just as nervous about sex as you are. Possibly more so – after all, you get to look like a stud the morning after; she’s worried you’ll think she’s a slut.

Your first time together will be awkward. There will be moments when you don’t know where to put your hands or she winces or you blurt out something stupid. It’s going to happen. The first step to building a sexual rapport is knowing how to deal with this. Sex shouldn’t be a serious business – if something goes wrong, don’t give up and don’t apologize. Laugh with her, and then try again.

Don’t try to use all your best moves the first time you sleep with someone. Girls often complain that changing positions breaks their mood, so if she likes what you’re doing, don’t spoil things by trying to spice them up.

Likewise, don’t feel like the longer you last the better you’ll be. If you’ve been hammering away for half an hour, there’s a good chance she’s getting uncomfortable; sometimes, less really is more.

There is one thing that girls can’t get enough of, though, and that’s foreplay. The fact is, if you want her to come back for more, you’ve got to make sure she enjoys herself. And that means using your fingers, your tongue and a lot of imagination. It may also mean looking for clues.

Unfortunately, girls are notoriously shy about telling us what they like, so instead of asking her what she wants in bed, watch how she behaves. If she pulls away, she wants less pressure; if she pushes forward, she wants more. Watch where she puts her hands – wherever she touches herself, take over; if she’s grabbing at you, be more forceful.

Don’t be afraid to tell her what you want, but do remember that when it comes to sex girls’ egos are easily bruised. Instead of telling her “don’t do that”, tell her what you would like instead; use guiding words like “harder”, “gentler”, “more” or “less”. When she does something you love, say so. If she’s getting something wrong, make it easier for her to deal with by sandwiching the news between two compliments, for example, “I love it when you go down on me. I got a couple of nips from your teeth, but the feel of your tongue is awesome.”

As you get to know her better, start talking about the things you would like to try and fantasies you want to act out. If you’re nervous about being so open, start by telling her you read about a great new trick in a magazine or you had a really dirty dream about her last night.

When she tells you her own fantasies, don’t dismiss them outright – unless you have real objections to them, give them a try; she’ll appreciate your attempt to please her, and you might just find you enjoy yourself!

By: Chick Magnet 101

Want to learn 50 WAYS for approaching, attracting and seducing women? If so, take a look at Scott Patterson’s Free eBook which provides 50 tips for instant dating success.

Many of us know the catchy Paul Simon song from the 70’s titled “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover.” This Valentine’s Day we’re offering to you instead, 50 ways to LOVE your lover! Well, it’s more like 20 but we take this as a starting off point.

We encourage you and your partner to consider these suggestions for more than just February 14th. To keep the passion and connection between you alive and growing, pay attention to romance every day of the year. Unfortunately in the midst of our busy lives, romantic acts tend to get left behind. Many can remember those early days of the relationship when all was just a little more exciting and heart fluttery. We’re here to tell you that you can live those feelings again and again in the present day—no matter how long you and your mate have been together.

When we talk about “romance” we don’t just envision flowers and cards with sappy sayings. Those are great, but you and your love need to find out what makes your hearts sing. You can start off by thinking about how you really want to be loved. What expressions of love that you may have experienced in the past (or maybe you’ve yet to experience) have made you feel simply great? Allow some ideas to come together and then share that with your love. Next, sit back and listen to how he or she wants to be loved. You might just be surprised by what you discover.

Try to keep your mind open and stay positive. This isn’t about blaming or feeling guilty for what’s not happening right now. Keep your focus on those good feelings and ideas for how to create more romantic moments of passion in your life together. Once you have your lists started and you’ve shared them with one another, make those things happen! Be sure to check in with each other as you start creating romantic moments because your lists may change and grow.

So here are some starter ideas for 50 ways to love your lover….

*Dinner at his or her favorite restaurant. If your love likes surprises, make it a surprise. Pretend like you two are the only ones in the room and focus only on one another.

*Give each other a massage or foot rub. Take a workshop to learn how to give a good massage and then make it a regularly occurring event.

*While you are apart, send your love an e-mail or text message to express your feelings—this could be sensual, appreciative, or as corny as you like!

*Write your partner a song. You don’t even have to know how to play a musical instrument. Just write a song that comes from your heart—silly, sexy, or anything in between are great.

*Try something new that you’ve both been wanting to do but haven’t made the time for (or had the guts to do yet). Anyone for skydiving????

*Slow dance. Put on your favorite tunes and groove together.

*Are you and your love sports fans? Surprise him or her with tickets to a local game or create an arena or stadium feel in your living room and have a game night together.

*Try a new way to make love. There are many helpful resources if you’d like ideas.

*Take a hike in nature. Hold hands and really tune in to the wonders all around you.

*Leave love notes for your mate. One man we know posted 15 notes all over the house declaring different ways he loves his wife to celebrate their 15 year anniversary.

*Meditate or pray together. Whatever your spiritual beliefs, share those great feelings practicing your faith together.

*Give your mate flowers or sweets simply for no reason. Perhaps you come to expect these things on February 14th, but how much sweeter when they arrive on a non-holiday day.

*Surprise your love with a candlelit dinner at home. This doesn’t even have to be fancy. An inexpensive dish like spaghetti can be made to feel special with the right touches. Try candles and music.

*Take a sensual bath together. Bubbles optional…

*Dream together. Get 2 pads of paper if you like and write down the dreams you have individually and as a couple. There are NO limits so allow yourself to go wild and have fun sharing your dreams. They may just come true!

*Volunteer for a cause you both believe in. Maybe it’s canvassing for a favorite political candidate or helping with a beautification project by your local stream.

*Set up a scavenger hunt and make yourself the “treasure” at the end.

*Arrange for childcare, if necessary, and get away for a weekend or overnight. This could be a luxurious hotel room or a rustic cabin in the woods. What do you like?

*Go to a concert together. Perhaps your favorite rock band is in town or you could attend a free symphony in the park.

*Your presence. (We didn’t say presents!) Being fully present and attentive to whatever your partner is sharing with you is a way to connect more deeply.

As you can see from our starter list of 50 ways to love your lover, there’s a lot of room for variety when it comes to romance. Passion can spring from seemingly simple or non-romantic acts. It all depends on what makes you feel alive and in love. In fact, there are a lot more than just 50 ways to love your lover. How many ways can you come up with and try?

By: Susie & Otto Collins

Susie and Otto Collins are Relationship Coaches and authors who help people create lives that are filled with more passion, love and connection. For more tips on turning up the heat in your love relationship, sign up for their free mini-course at Red Hot Love Relationships.com

Most men, and I’m talking about 95% of them, have no idea how or why women feel that amazing emotion called attraction for some men. And if they do have an idea, it’s usually dead wrong.

Man and woman are different when it comes to attraction. Man usually attracted by the physical appearance first but woman is more attracted to the personality. That’s the basic principle of attraction between man and woman. Now, let’s talk about the underlying process that creates attraction for woman.

Attraction isn’t a choice. It’s an emotional reaction. Women don’t “choose” to feel attraction for a man. You maybe know that woman would choose a man who is taller than her, but if you see the reality, you can see that many women is go out and date with a man who is shorter than her. What happen here?? Attraction is not a choice.

Attraction isn’t logical, in the sense that it isn’t created by things that “should” create it. Buying women dinner and gifts, giving lots of compliments when you first meet a woman, and kissing up to women to get their approval are examples of “logical” things that should create attraction, but don’t. When you understand how attraction works, you begin to see that it has a “logic” all its own.

If you really understand how attraction works then almost anything will work. If you will take the time to learn how and why women feel that interesting and magical emotional response called attraction for some rare men, and not for all the other men running around, then everything changes.

Here are a few interesting points. There are a few physical cues, or specific types of “body language” that instantly tell a woman whether or not you’re a guy that is even worth a second glance.

If you don’t know what these things are, and how to use them, then the game will be over before it has even started. Scary. Women test men constantly. And attractive women test men much more intensely than “regular” women. If you don’t know how to spot these tests (and most of them are very subtle), and then deal with them, you’re going to lose your chance to create attraction before you even get it.

Ok, so what should we guys do to? Take time and learn how attraction works for women…

By: Ricko

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